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Sunday, 13 January 2013

Taking advantage

 At the time of this story I was a first year student nurse, in my fourth week of a hospital placement. I could have, essentially, been described as an eager to please, push over. I don't mean to stereotype but old men have been known to take advantage of nurses/nursing assistants/student nurses for the sake of laziness or just to get a sponge bath from a young lady. Sneaky buggers. Now, this gentleman I am still unsure of his capabilities. He was paralysed from the waist down and during his morning wash managed to clean his top half and asked for assistance on his lower half. I believe this to be absolutely fair enough. Here I am nervously gloved up with wet, soapy hands cleaning his legs, bum and man parts. He then asked me the question I had been dreading since the start of my training. "Could you clean under my foreskin, please?" It's part of my job to oblige. So I reiterate, here I am with wet, soapy, shaking hands. I pull said foreskin back, when he then decides to inform me of how tight it is and I might have a job getting it back up over the head of his manhood. I clean, I dry and I try to pull it back up. No dice. It felt like and eternity, but I was stood there for a good few minutes, turning more and more red, attempting to inch this man's foreskin back his penis. WET, SOAPY GLOVES. Eventually he offers his assistance and does it himself pretty quickly. This is when I make my quick exit and take a minute to contemplate, that if he could reach to help... he could have helped a lot sooner and he also could have washed his own effing knob. It dawns on me that I have essential given a seventy year old man a hand job. Although, in the spirit of charity it's one for his wank bank. Timid nurse gets liberal with her soapy fingers. 

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